


These Days

by felixiomarshall



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Abuse, Emotional Abuse, Human AU, I PLAN ON THIS HAVING A HAPPY ENDING, Mute Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Sort Of, Unsympathetic Logic | Logan Sanders, Unsympathetic Morality | Patton Sanders, for the record, ok does anyone know "no children" by tmg?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:28:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26443435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felixiomarshall/pseuds/felixiomarshall
Summary: Virgil is mute (oh and he lives in an attic, he’s always lived there) and life is kinda a tiny bit not right. He starts to realize this, of course, when he gets a secret “forbidden” friend who shares lots of cool (and slightly feral) ideas. How long until the secrets of his family are unravelled? If they even are a family. And who is the mysterious third voice Virgil hears but has never met? Is he part of the family? There's a lot of questions in this fic, do you really want the answers?
Comments: 4
Kudos: 31





	1. Sunny Day

**Author's Note:**

> Have you ever heard the song "No Children" by The Mountain Goats?  
> It's not relevant now, but I wanted to ask.

He had just started studying today- sat up in his attic with beams of sunlight lazily floating through the large, triangular window by his bed. With how calm it seemed, Virgil almost could’ve mistook the early 7am atmosphere for a tranquil summer’s afternoon. Maybe it was the lack of shouting.

When he heard Patton’s bedroom door creak open, he held his breath for a second but smiled. Patton waking up sometimes meant loud arguments with Logan, but always meant breakfast.

A knock on the door.

“Hey kid- I brought breakfast.” Patton sounded really happy today, obviously whatever interactions downstairs went well. Virgil tapped on the floor twice and smiled as his protector (but more importantly, waffles) entered. Patton softly placed the plate on the desk, next to Virgil’s laptop. “So how’s studying going? Gonna make mr. grumpy proud?” he asked.  
_I’m on 11th grade work right now-_ Virgil signed  
“Ooh, I didn’t know you’d moved up! What subject?” Patton asked.  
_Logan said I could move up today. At this second I’m on Physics. It’s a lot harder than 10th and I’m a bit worried…_ he trailed off, looking down.  
Patton smiled softly “Well, kiddo, I’m sure you’ll get your head round it. Now, I’ll leave you to your physics (but more importantly, waffles).” He whistled briskly to himself and left.

The day was almost not normal. Virgil almost just sat in his attic and worked on the sheets, read the textbooks and occasionally pulled out a secret book he owned to flick through. But then, like usual, there was a crash downstairs and, like usual, he heard Logan scream. He couldn’t hear what either of them were screeching about (he never could) but they just were. There was a fizz of electricity, or something, and everything went silent before the usual third voice hopped in.

Virgil didn’t really know who the third voice was. Roman, a family friend around his age- if they were a family- was still at school at this time and it just didn’t sound like him. It also wasn’t Virgil’s secret friend, the one who gave him the books, because the others didn’t know about him. So that limited it to someone he didn’t know which, according to one of Virgil’s books, was a list of about seven billion.

-

Once he had finished all his work and Logan had come upstairs to collect it, he was just left to read and wait. And the waiting paid off. Eventually, he heard the front door open and a fast figure bounce up the stairs before proceeding to burst open his door.

“No need to be bored any longer, Virgil! I come bearing DVDs!” a melodramatic young man clutching a carrier bag stood in his doorway.  
Virgil tried not to laugh. _Hey Roman._ He signed nonchalantly. _How was school?_  
“Oh come on!” Roman dumped the DVDs on the floor just in front of the sofas “I’ve got Frozen 2 and I managed to get a really good deal on some weird nature documentary for your ecology stuff- don’t take that tone with me!”  
_I can’t speak._ Virgil smirked.  
“I’m talking about your psychic tone.” He said smugly.  
Virgil raised his eyebrows. _Psychic tone? Do you mean my facial expression?_  
Roman scoffed “That’s just a fancy way of saying ‘psychic tone’, emo-boy.” He sat himself down on the sofa and beckoned Virgil over. “Now let me show you the glory of Frozen 2!”

-

In the late evening, Virgil left his room simply to go to the toilet. He remembered that one time Patton had said he’d had a discussion with Logan about moving Virgil to a different room so he’d be closer to the bathroom, but Virge liked the attic and it never got past discussion stage.

Today, though, he bumped into Logan. Physically.

_I’m sorry!_ Virgil signed, panicked.  
“Why are you outside of your room?” Logan asked, quietly “I almost dropped my briefcase, I’d like to obtain some information as to why you needed to be an obstacle at this exact moment.” Virgil indicated towards the bathroom door. “Ah. An unavoidable biological function, proceed.” Logan gestured and the younger guy walked quickly towards it. “Halt!” Logan suddenly said “Your work was adequate today, to say you have only just moved up from the 10th grade curriculum. Congratulations.” He nodded, before turning around to enter his office.

Virgil wasn’t a big fan of Logan. One of his earliest memories was when Virgil tried to sneak downstairs… It was clear Logan didn’t want to be friends.

Virgil had a secret friend though, one who only turned up at night, with his scandalous books and fantastical stories. He had a friend that didn’t need monitoring or marking, or anything like that, who was going to climb through the window he’d left open any minute now!

“Boo!”


	2. Strange Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil takes a risk.

Remus didn’t climb into Virgil’s room every night, passionately declaring “all cops are bastards” and desperately clutching a bag full of Jolly Ranchers (and god knows what else). No. Even he had to be careful sometimes, ensuring Roman or their parents hadn’t noticed he’d left. So on some nights, Virgil sat waiting, watching the clouds pass lazily under the stars, without even a hint of a friend bearing forbidden books from far away lands.

But when he did visit? They’d talk about things Virge would never even dream of asking about- not even from Roman! History (the parts the books left out), geography (how big the world really was), culture (what ‘holidays’ were) and writing (Remus’ favourite topic), to name a few, leaving the bewildered Virgil to digest whatever conversations had just taken place at his own peril.

It was as Virgil had just finished his breakfast, brought to him by Patton as usual, and was about to start working on poetry annotation when he remembered something his strange friend had said.

“What are you reading other people’s words for? You should be out there, making mistakes, kissing boys, eating ass, getting high, overthrowing the government! You know? What most kids whatever your age is are doing!”

Normally Remus would be the kinda guy to encourage reading, but he was always saying things like that. Fortunately, Virgil always quite helpfully pointed out the many, many, many, many, risks in getting behind on his studies. But Remus had a point- as he sometimes did. Virgil had told his strange secret about the arguing before, explained that it just was, but Remus never really took anything as it ‘just was’.

 _They just shout a lot._ He had signed, shrugging.  
“Yeah, dumbfuck, but what about!”  
_I don’t know, can’t hear them from here, can I?_  
“Well have ya ever put ya ear to the floor?” asked Remus, as if he was querying about the weather.  
_I… I really don’t think I should._ A chill had come over his spine. _It’s a far better idea to just hide up here in my space._  
“But you’d still be hiding! It’s perfect!”  
He had shook his head vigorously at this. _There’s this third voice, he’s different. I just don’t think I should listen…_  
“A secret third voice!” Remus whisper-screeched “oh my SHIT you have GOT to listen in some time!”

But the shouting began again today, Logan and Patton’s voices intertwined about some issue… no issue? The same issue? Remus had never pressed Virgil about it in the weeks that followed, that wasn’t like him. But it was like those words had been pressing Virgil closer to the floorboards over the many days and hours… he was always going to do this.

“With modern information the subject is showing unprecedented prog-” he could hear Logan spit out coldly.  
“Yes! I get it! You want to see how far your pet gets, that’s all this is to you-” Patton cut him off, to be cut off himself.  
“Falsehood! That is a complete strawman of my perspective and you’re aware of it.”  
“Well, whatever.” Patton snorted. “There are more important things in this house than your ‘project’- you! Are obsessed.”  
“Perhaps, but at least I provide more to the house than cooking.”  
“You know full well I do more than-”  
“Cease!” The third voice finally made an entrance. “Argue everyday if you must, lord knows I’ve been putting up with it for long enough, but not while we have an audience.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I get to the end of what I've written, updates will NOT be so frequent you guys...


	3. Noon Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil asks questions, Roman realizes that they are quickly approaching dangerous territory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think there's two chapters after this that I've WRITTEN already, then we get into stuff in my brain, etc. Anyway enjoy!

Virgil froze. His ear was still pressed hard against the floor, but it shouldn’t- he shouldn’t- he needed-

“An audience?” Logan asked, poking at what the third voice had just revealed.   
“Yes,” it said, quieter than it had spoken before “I feel we are being… observed.”

Finally Virgil managed to tear himself away from the wood, breathing heavily. Never again. He couldn’t risk it, he just couldn’t. Not to mention the fifty different aneurisms that it could’ve caused out of sheer stress! Hopefully, The third voice didn’t manage to psychically-locate him or something… He went on like this as he tried to study, thinking over and over about every variant where he got caught and kicked out and killed and thrown off of a cliff and so on until the words became soup and the numbers danced off of the pages to join The Black Parade.

Eventually the time came to hand his half-done work in, which would surely indicate that he was the spy and became so distressed and-

“Virgil!”

And they’d let Roman over to visit?

_Roman? I thought I did really bad?_ He asked.   
“Oh, you did. But Logan said it might be because of some lack of brain-relax-y stuff and Patton agreed, so they thought they’d invite moi because I’m the greatest at relaxation!” Roman leapt enthusiastically onto one of the beanbags, narrowly avoiding hitting his head on the floor. “So! What’s bothering my bro? Well, not my ‘bro’, but… anyway what’s up?”

Virgil thought about it. Properly, really thought through the dilemma he’d been having for a while now- what to say to his best friend? How much? He couldn’t talk about his knowledge of Remus (not just that, their friendship). Or maybe he could and everything would be okay…

_Well…_   
“Go on!” Roman encouraged.   
_Why have I never been outside?_   
Roman’s face fell, his eyes darted around the room and he bit his lip slightly. He sighed, seeming tired and confused. “Because you’re different.”   
_Because I can’t speak?_   
“No, you’re just… God, this is always so hard. Look you’re just not like other kids your age”   
_How old am I?_   
Roman chuckled a little “That’s a, uh, an interesting question, but not for today.”   
_What am I, Roman?_   
“Please don’t.”   
_Don’t what?_   
“Ask so many questions! You can’t, Virgil, you cannot.” He nearly shouted, fists clenched.   
_I… I don’t understand._   
“Look, I’m gonna have to report all of this to Patton and Logan and- well, it’s just, they’re not gonna go easy on you.”

_What?_ His heart dropped. _You can’t tell them, please Roman._   
“But I have to relay everything that goes on…” Roman finally held eye contact “okay. Just this once, we played Mario Kart and talked shit about dumb fashion or cute boys in magazines, but you can’t ever mention this stuff to me again.”

Virgil nodded.

And they did actually play Mario Kart.

-

“So, did you two have fun?” he heard Patton ask, as Roman was leaving.   
“Yeah, just talked about clothes and played video games, you know? Nothing out of the ordinary.”

**Author's Note:**

> Oh boy this. Okay so by the warnings and stuff it looks a lot more angsty than it is, and I don't really have a defence for that, but I'm just gonna say it's not 24/7 abuse/angst/hurt etc. you know? There are fun things in this fic it's just quite heavy in parts (from what I've written so far AND my plans ohohoh BOI). I may have to change the archive warnings but I'm unsure right now so ok.  
> Warnings (some more-so for later parts, but still relevant): abuse, emotional abuse, burns, burn scars, scarring, u!Logan, u!Patton, physical violence/injury (I don't think they're that graphic).


End file.
